The Wonderful World of MorPRi

The Visscher-Bridges toxicity scale

Due to popular request, the Visscher-Bridges toxicity scale:
10 Phases of Drunkenness: a study in modern behaviours

1. Low level ‘tipsy’; fake drunk
2. ‘Loving’ feeling OR feelings of rage/depression
3. ‘Grabbiness’ or overtly seeking physical intimacy
4. Aggressiveness or willingness to engage in combat
5. Slurring words, with addition of trouble connecting thoughts
6. Difficulty walking and infantile motor capacity
7. Nausea
8. Vomiting
9. Waking up in a pool of own vomit
10. Hospitalization or other medical side effects as a result of alcohol poisoning


‘Tipsy’ is defined as an awkward “light”, happy feeling associated with the early stages of excessive consumption of alcohol.

‘Loving’ is defined as the emotional state of being in which an individual expresses feelings of endearment/tenderness. (In most cases these feelings are a return to the earlier stages of Maslow’s Basic Needs pyramid, and also, though unrelated, quite often unwarranted.)

‘Grabbiness’ is defined as the state in which those of the predominantly male sex are prone to “grabbing” body parts of another individual. (This is a continuation of the prior level of drunkenness, wherein the individual relies heavily upon basic needs, ie: food, water, and sexual activity.)



*This list has been compiled with the assistance of my colleagues Johnicus, Pryscilla and Morgasm. I am appreciative of their extensive knowledge, and practical expertise in this area, without which I may never have been able to adequately identify the specific levels of debauchery.

Yours in pretension,

Angela Visscher

Say, we hit a solid 8.5 on that one on Sunday, eh? maybe borderline 9, but I think that may be a little exaggerated. But then again, I don't really need alcohol to hit a 3 or a 6. Heck, the lownj was a perma 3 with the qowtche awv luv4Q. What a qowtche. How I miss thee, qowtche awv luv4Q...
-PRi4Q

posted by MorPRi @ 9:33 PM